One of our values at Hearth&Sea is openness, which we define as:
moving, being and thinking in a way that is open rather than closed. Seeing ourselves and our lives as fluid, adaptable and flexible. Relishing the idea that nothing is fixed in place.
So today I wanted to dive deeper into what this means to us, and what it could mean to you in your life.
As we see it our lives are mostly lived in lines and boxes. Think about the way we move, sit and go about our days. We walk, drive or otherwise commute to work moving along one plane of motion. We sit at our desks, do our work and go home. Our routines, day to day, often don’t vary very much. Whether we work in a cubicle office or not, we’re pretty much boxed in all day long.
Even the labels we give ourselves support this boxing in. We’re encouraged to find a label and stick to it. Working mother/producer/accountant/stay at home dad/white/black/mixed race/fat/thin/straight/gay…we like our labels and we like them clear so that we can put ourselves and others into nice ordered boxes.
Even the trajectories of our lives (or the main societally promoted ones at least) follow, ideally, a nice upward curve. No deviations, no wriggly bits off to the side, just a steady progression upwards. Find a career, work your way up, find a partner, get a house, have a family, purchase outward symbols of success. Our habits and routines, too, keep us on the straight and narrow often bringing feelings of unease when they are disrupted. But, as Gretchen Rubin says in her book Better Than Before “habit is a good servant but a bad master”.
Of course there are good reasons why we have our lines and boxes. As humans we don’t enjoy that which cannot be easily defined, the things we don’t understand. They trouble us, and make us feel uneasy. They speak to that ancient part of our brain concerned with safety and survival and they make us feel unsafe. This probably goes some of the way towards explaining why, on a whole, we have such a hard time accepting gender fluidity, people making huge pivots in their lives and careers and people whose racial identity isn’t easy to pin down.
It makes us feel scared and uncomfortable, but out of discomfort comes growth.
The effects of living in such a linear world is that we have no room for deviation, for failure, for seeing other possibilities. Or, for noticing the wonderful, magical and joyful experiences that often live just outside of the straight lines and boxes.
The good thing about studying the creative arts (because I will find any reason to shout about the positives of studying Drama and English Literature), and living a creative life in general, is it enables you to practise non-linear thinking. This is a great skill.
And the good news is this openness of being, this non-linear thinking, is something we can all practice. And, with practice, it is strengthened until it becomes our natural state of being in the world. A state of being that allows us to see our lives as fluid, adaptable and flexible.
Kindling
Think of one part of your daily routine (how you get to work or what you do on that journey), decide one small way to change it. For example take a different street to the one you usually do, use your right hand instead of your left, sit in a different chair. How do you feel? Do you notice any effects on the rest of your day? The next day choose a different part of your routine and play with that. Experiment with breaking free from your box and see what you discover.